verbal-0rchid.com

Some Flowers Only Bloom in the Imagination

BJ Ettiquette

| June 8, 2008

Blowjob Etiquette (by a female) 1. First and foremost, we are not obligated to do it. 2. Extension to rule #1 – So if you get one, be grateful. 3. I don’t care WHAT they did in the porn video you saw, it is not standard practice to cum on someone’s face. 4. Extension to […]

“Because I’m a Guy”

| June 8, 2008

Because I’m a guy, I must hold the television remote control in my hand while I watch TV. If the thing has been misplaced, I’ll miss a whole show looking for it, though one time I was able to survive by holding a calculator. Because I’m a guy, when I lock my keys in the […]

Battle of the Sexes

| June 8, 2008

The Last 11 Things Any Man Would Ever Say:         * I think Barry Manilow is one cool motherfucker.         * While I’m up, can I get you a beer?         * I think hairy butts are really sexy.         * Her tits […]

A little salt on the rim….

| June 8, 2008

Seven New York City bartenders were asked if they could nail a woman’s personality based on what she drinks. Though interviewed separately, they concurred on almost all counts. The results: Drink: Beer Personality: Casual, low-maintenance; down to earth. Your Approach: Challenge her to a game of pool. Drink: Blender Drinks Personality: Flaky, annoying; a pain […]